


We need a raise

by AcedaVinci



Series: Kingsman and friends [2]
Category: James Bond (Movies), Kingsman: The Secret Service (2015)
Genre: Established Harry Hart | Galahad/Gary "Eggsy" Unwin, M/M, MI6, Merlin and Q aren't paid enough, blowing up buildings, kingsman - Freeform, mafia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-01
Updated: 2015-11-01
Packaged: 2018-04-29 11:37:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,816
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5126084
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AcedaVinci/pseuds/AcedaVinci
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>MI6 and Kingsman are on a joint mission, Merlin and Q aren't paid enough.</p>
            </blockquote>





	We need a raise

**Author's Note:**

> So a while ago MissEliza24 gave me a prompt after an other quick fic I did : Please tell me there is more coming?! I loved this little piece and it would be awesome if you could write more. For example a joint mission with Galahad and 007. Q and Merlin on the comms and both being ready to resign after.... Do you take prompts? Cause I think I just gave you one... If not feel free to ignore! Anyways loved it and hoping there will be more.
> 
> I was able to write it, I hope you'll like it !  
> This is unbeta'd, if you see any mistake do not hesitate to tell me ! English isn't my first language, so I apologise in advance.

“007, I said right, 007 … BOND.”

“Yes, I heard you the first time, Q.”

“If you could answer when I'm talking to you, it would be great.”

“Prepare to meet Galahad in about 2 minutes.”

“Galahad, turn left and wait for further instructions. I said left … EGGSY FOR GOD'S SAKE … why did you turn right ?”

“Well, I spotted 007, so ...” Eggsy was waving to the other agent.

\-- A day prior --

Merlin had called Eggsy for a briefing before going on a mission, he already knows he will be having a massive headache afterwards. Harry, sat next to him, was smiling.

“My poor Merlin, you don't have to handle this mission.”

“Yes, I fucking do. Do you know why ? Because your husband can't leave a building without destroying it AND he will with 007 which means Q will be there. He is probably the only one to know what I'm really going through.” The wizard took off his glasses and pinched the bridge of his nose. 

“It wouldn't be fun without a little explosion now, would it ?” Arthur was grinning.

“I swear, the two of you are going to be the death of me.” Merlin wasn't smiling, he knew his friend would do anything to make fun of him. Before he could answer, Eggsy entered the room.

“Bruv, can't you just send a damn text ? I ain't wearing my glasses when I'm in the shower, no need to fucking set the fire alarm on !”

Harry laughed, the Scottish man must really want to get on with the meeting.

“Not my fault if you're talking forever.” He brushed Eggsy off “Now, gentlemen, glasses please.” 

The Wizard looked at his clipboard, touched it and a face appeared on the mirror in front of them.

“This is Alessandro Nicoletti, italian mafia, Cosa Nostra to be precise. He and his friends have been smuggling weapons into the country for some time, Percival was able to gather some intel and to discover their hide out. His right-hand, Massimiliano Contadino,” he said while putting the criminal's face on the mirror “is being hunted by the MI6, he's been hiding for 4 months now but we have reasons to believe that he is now with Nicoletti, in London, probably not too far from Denham in the London surburbs.”

Eggsy's eyes lit up.

“MI6, are we teaming up with James ?” He seemed to be in a better mood than when he arrived.

“Yes, we are. That is why I'll be your handler and I'll be teaming up with Q because God knows what both of you are going to do.” Merlin typed on his clipboard and the faces disappeared “Now, gentlemen, I believe you have a few hours of rest before Eggsy and I leave. Galahad, I'll see you tomorrow morning.” 

Merlin left the room leaving his boss with his favourite agent.

Meanwhile at the MI6, M, Q and 007 were having the same meeting.

“Bond, late as usual.” Q knew 007 would be late, he made a mental note to tell him the wrong time for the next meeting, maybe the agent will be on time.

“Nice to see you too, Q. Ma'am.” He sat next to M. 

“007, we have a new mission for you. As you may know, some of our agents were tracking Massimiliano Contadino, right-hand of Alessandro Nicoletti.” 

“The Sicilian mafia ?” 007 raised an eyebrow, the Sicilian mafia is always trouble, well, mafia usually means trouble anyway.

“Yes, Cosa nostra has been smuggling weapons into the country for a while now but a series of events made it clear that we need to take care of the problem. Q, if you could explain the plan, please.”

“Yes, Ma'am. The MI6 has been hunting Massimiliano Contadino because it's the easiest way to get to Nicoletti but we discover that our friends from Kingsman are also chasing after them. That's why we'll be working with two of their agents.”

Bond straightened up, working with Kingsman ? He wondered which agents would be working with them.

“You finally seem interested. Wait until I tell you who will be working with us.” Q was smiling “Although it probably means more headaches for me.”

“Will we be working with the young Galahad ?” James was hoping it would be Eggsy, he liked the lad. 

“Indeed and Merlin, he will be Galahad's handler, they'll be coming here tomorrow morning.”

“007, I'm telling you in advance” M was now talking “if any building explode I'm keeping your pay-check.”

Tomorrow is going to be great.

The next morning, Eggsy woke up excited, he was happy to see James, it's been a while since their last joint mission and Harry couldn't contain his agent.

“Come on, love. You're going to be late and Merlin is going to make my life a living hell.” 

“Harry ! I'm gonna work with James again ! Ain't it great ?” If Harry didn't know Eggsy was a trained assassin, he would have thought he had just seen Father Christmas. 

“Yes, it is. I know you're very fond of him but try to calm down or else Merlin is going to make both of us disappear.” he said laughing. Galahad always thought 007 was the greatest agent to ever walk the earth, before he met Harry and heard of Kingsman. Now, Bond was 3rd on his list, right after Harry and Merlin, Roxy being out because she is, in Eggsy's words “a goddess that cannot be classified”. Although Harry suspected she threatened Eggsy so he would call her like this. They both left for the HQ when Merlin managed to make all the fire alarms go off.

Once they arrived, after saying goodbye to each other, Merlin and Galahad left for the MI6 where Q was waiting for them.

“Merlin, what a pleasure to see you again.”

“Pleasure is all mine, Q. I believe we're in for a wild ride.”

“Don't remind me.”

“Hey, I'm here too you know.” said Eggsy while shaking Q's hand. 

They then headed toward the meeting room where 007 was already waiting.

“James !” 

“Eggsy ! Nice to see you.” 

Both agents went for a hug, everyone knew they got along very well. A bit too well if you ask Merlin and Q but as James said once after a joint mission “he is like the little brother he never wanted.” which is probably why Harry allowed him to be this friendly with Eggsy.

“Q and I will be handling the mission from here, both you will enter from a different location and will meet inside. You need to check both side of the building, that's why Eggsy, you'll be entering by the back entrance and Bond by the main entrance. And yes, before you ask, you can enter because the guards are on the last floor.” explained Merlin. 

The mission was simple, get inside the building where Nicoletti and Contadino were hiding, kill them, get out and leave without blowing up the place. Easy, right ? Well, obviously it didn't go as planned.

\-- back to now -- 

“007, I said right, 007 … BOND.”

“Yes, I heard you the first time, Q.”

“If you could answer when I'm talking to you, it would be great.”

“Prepare to meet Galahad in about 2 minutes.”

“Galahad, turn left and wait for further instructions. I said left … EGGSY FOR GOD'S SAKE … why did you turn right ?”

“Well, I spotted 007, so ...” Eggsy was waving to the other agent.

“You were suppose to meet on the floor above you !”

“Sorry guv !”

“Don't you 'guv' me, when you get back I'm going to make sure you get send to Siberia.”

Galahad looked at 007, he mouthed “I'm so fucked” to which Bond replied with a smile.

“Now that both of you are together, move toward the stairs on your left.” said Q “Once you're there, go up one floor, Nicoletti and Contadino should be in the last room on your left.”

Once they arrived upstairs, Merlin gave them one last instruction.

“Check on each side, the floor should be full of guards, be as silent as possible and for God's sake, do NOT blow up the building.”

“I don't know why both of you keep telling us not to blow up the building.” answered Bond.

“Yeah, last time we was bein' chased, we ain't goin' to fuck things up every time.” replied Eggsy, Merlin knew the agent was grinning.

“Shut up and go.”

The two agents engaged the fight with a few guards, like Merlin instructed. They fought their way to the last room on their left as Q said, they entered and that's where their comms went silent.

“Merlin, what's going on ?” asked Q while typing as fast as he could on his keyboard.

“I don't know, get the communication back on, I'm trying to get Galahad's feed !” Merlin started to panic, what if something happened ?  
After a few minutes of silence, the handlers heard a laugh and a voice coming through their comms.

“Well, that was fun.” Bond's voice was a little too happy for the handlers taste.

They heard Eggsy laugh.

“Galahad, what happened ? We couldn't get anything, the comms went silent and your feed disappeared.” enquired Merlin.

“Nothin' really, my glasses fell and shut down, don't ask me how. After we was having to many fucking guards runnin' toward us, we was havin' trouble.” Merlin could picture Eggsy's smug face.

“Indeed, but you should have seen the rest. Galahad shot Contadino first, Nicoletti was screaming obscenities in Italian, I'm pretty sure I heard 'stronzi” at some point. I shot Nicoletti and we heard guards coming from the corridor so we run for it and we, hypothetically, I'm not saying we did, blew up the building.”

“Bond ! What did we say about that ?” Q had taken his glasses off and was rubbing his eyes, Merlin knew he would be having a headache later.

“But bruv ! They was chasing us and hand grenades are the fucking best, you shoulda seen the fireworks.” 

“Eggsy, I swear, you're going to fucking Siberia.”

“Oh come on, Merlin ! Ya know Harry won't let you do that !”

“Watch me.”

“Told you I was fucked.” said Eggsy to James.

“Get back to MI6, we need to debrief and we need to make sure you don't get paid, 007.” Q grabbed the mug on his right “I don't get paid enough for dealing with Bond.”

“You and me both. Can you imagine having to deal with Arthur AND Galahad on a daily basis ?”

“God no. One is enough, coffee ?” said Q as he offered a mug to Merlin.

“Yes, please.” answered Merlin as he took the mug “One more like this and I'll hand over my resignation.”

“And then I'll have to deal with them by myself ? Ask for a raise.”

“Yes, I'll do that.” he brought his mug to his mouth, took a sip and said “Harry owes me at least a million pounds for this one.”

**Author's Note:**

> Do not hesitate to comment, I'm on tumblr as well assbutt-moriarty !


End file.
